Mommie Dearest

We all hear about bad mothers—women who do unspeakable things to their children—and are appalled by their behavior. Standing in the checkout line at Marc’s during the Casey Anthony trial, it seemed almost every magazine had a cover story about the tragic death of Caylee Anthony. Bad mothering, and especially abhorrently awful non-mothering, is big news; maybe because it is so shocking for those of us who try our best to be decent parents?

 A recent news headline  about a mother, Kimberly Garrity, said her children were suing her for “bad mothering.” The plaintiffs, Steven II and Kathryn, now in their 20s, haven’t recovered from the horrendous treatment they suffered at the hands of their mother. Good for them, and how brave, to stand up as adults and ask their mother be held accountable for her actions.

Steven II and Kathryn spent two years waging their legal battle and seeking justice from the state of Illinois, as well as $50,000 from Kimberly. An appeals court decision ruled Kimberly’s behavior as a mother was neither, “extreme nor outrageous.” The judgment also noted ruling in favor of Steven II and Kathryn might, “open the floodgates to subject family child-rearing (to) excessive judicial scrutiny and interference.”

We want to protect children from abuse, so opening the floodgates doesn’t seem like such a bad idea, does it? It might be, if courts set a precedent allowing lawsuits every time a parent:

• Gave their child a silly birthday card without cash or a check enclosed in it.
• Called their child on Homecoming night to verify their whereabouts.
• Imposed a curfew of midnight.
• Insisted their children wear a seatbelt, and, when they didn’t, threatening to call the police.

These are just a few of Kimberly Garrity’s bad mothering techniques which earned her a lawsuit and the scorn of her adult children. According to multiple news sources of her “wrongdoings,” Steven II was the most disturbed by the money-less birthday card. Even better, the siblings’ father, Steven Miner, helped represent his children in court against his former wife, Kimberly. Miner said while he asked his children to not file the case, he also felt parents should be accountable for their actions.

Really?

Maggie probably thinks I am a bad mother at times. Right off the top of my head, I can think of countless offenses I have committed against her, preventing her from having a good childhood. A few examples:

• When I accidentally zipped her chin into her winter coat in the morning rush to kindergarten — and then quickly unzipped it because I didn’t know what to do.
• On her birthday at a Mexican restaurant, her dad and I arranged for the servers to plop a sombrero on her head while singing “Happy Birthday” in Spanish, one of “the most embarrassing moments of my life,” according to Maggie.
• Telling her to let me sleep in one day a weekend and asking her to quietly watch H20  or a movie on Netflix.
• Refusing to buy her $9 crackle nail polish and instead buying myself something.

I think Maggie has a pretty good case against me. Maybe to the tune of $100,000 and we’re only half-way through her childhood. Just think of the damage I could do by the time she is 18.

I feel sorry for Kimberly Garrity and all the press surrounding her children’s case. Not because she is guilty of the type of bad mothering her children claim, but because she probably knows something is really wrong with her kids. I also imagine her children—whose names are now splashed across the Internet and are associated with ungratefulness and whining—might have a difficult time finding dates or marriage partners someday. Just think of being married to someone who might turn around and sue you for making a dinner they didn’t like, or calling to be sure they were safe, or giving them a birthday card.

Yikes! What is the world coming to?